Nezumi ultimately becomes more like Shion, Shion becomes more like Nezumi.Īs they begin their infiltration, Shion begins to grow more and more cold and uncaring of human life. They quite make the perfect narrative foil to one another, developing in an almost polar opposite way. While Nezumi develops to see the light of humanity and within his own soul through loving Shion, Shion develops to see the darkness in humanity and within his own soul by loving Nezumi. Time and time again, it is clear that Shion’s humanity and compassion save Nezumi from doom. Shion is a beacon of light shining down on Nezumi, exposing his own humanity. Shion attempts to kill two men, both times Nezumi reprimands him, telling him: “Never put your hands around someone’s throat again!” and “Shion! Shion! Stop - stop, please - Shion, I’m begging you.” and “I want you to stay as you are, Shion.” Shion keeps Nezumi human. Nezumi has been captured by the light that he sees in Shion, and though Shion is the one to think that Nezumi keeps him human, it’s quite the other way around. He isn’t saying this only to Shion, but more so to himself. He promises Shion that they will come back from this together. Once entering the Correctional Facility, Nezumi warns Shion not to lose himself. Nezumi has started to become more self aware through his relationship with Shion, and more in touch with his own emotions. He thinks: “Am I the one who hasn’t known anything all along?” while questioning his past actions, and whether or not he has been seeing Shion in a positive light or not. He’s completely aware at this point of his own feelings. While Shion admits a love confession, saying: “I’m probably more afraid to lose you than anything - anybody else.” This sparks a fear in Nezumi, at the reality that not only is Shion attached to him, but that he is just as attached to Shion. It gently pried Shion’s fist open, finger by finger, gently, as if toying with it.” Nezumi still has moments of random bursts of aggression, both in an attempt to continue to keep Shion at bay, to keep from falling more in love, and to prevent Shion from aiding the city or its people in any manner. Gradually, more and more, we see Nezumi not only reciprocating moments of intimacy, but initiating them with Shion: “A hand suddenly reached over to him. Safu continuously compares herself to the person Shion is yearning for, asking why she cannot be them, why she cannot be the one to get to know everything about Shion. Both Safu and Nezumi are in love with Shion, but I would argue that the difference between them, other than obvious ones, as that Nezumi comes to see Shion exactly for who he is, the love he feels for Shion not blinding himself, but illuminating the entire world, whereas Safu does not. He would and will do anything to keep from losing it. He does not want to return to a life of seclusion and loneliness, a life without love. I don’t want to lose him.” Nezumi is falling in love with Shion, whether he realizes it at this moment or not is besides the point. I’m going to be the one to suffer for my whole life. If - if by some chance, he ends up never coming back. She says: “I don’t want to regret anything. This admission is paralleled to Safu’s in a prior scene, where she admits to Karan, Shion’s mother, that she is in love with Shion. He was attached from the very moment Shion and he met. Nezumi has already begun to grow attached. He compares the loss to the loss of his own family, and of the suffering he would feel if that were to occur. When he learns of Safu’s abduction, instead of telling Shion, he begins to think of how if Shion found out, it would result in his death. He begins to lose his sense of control over himself, leaving the door to his home unlocked without even realizing it, sighing over Shion, and risking his own safety to send messages to Shion’s mother unprompted. More and more, he begins to simply sit around and watch Shion, thinking about how beautiful Shion is, how nice it would be to touch him and how much he wants to have physical contact with him, playing with his hair. It isn’t that Nezumi is completely helpless from falling in love with Shion, it’s that he actually wants to be loved by the boy, even if only deep down. I suspect that a small part of Nezumi wanted to do this (go against Gran’s orders), though he reprimands himself multiple times for his actions. We are told that Nezumi went against Gran’s instruction simply by rescuing Shion.
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